Ted Cruz Endorses Donald Trump: Go Vote While Unconscious (Drunk)

by John Galt
September 23, 2016 15:40 ET


Just sigh.

The most principled Constitutionalist who ran for the Presidency in decades has now decided to change his stance from “vote your conscience” to supporting the Cheetos Jesus.

I get the pressure.

I understand the feeling of being left out of the reindeer games with his fellow Republicrats.


But just ugh.

The only commentary I have on this, and please remember, I’m a registered Libertarian since 2004 who is NOT voting for Gary Johnson is the following:

I want my money back.

All of it.

And since “voting your conscience” is now no longer an option, I think I shall Uber over to a bar on Election Day, get unconscious, then Uber over to the voting booth, and see where I color in the circle for whomever; I can promise you it won’t be Stein or Hillary, so probably the Constitution Party candidate if I do not pass out first. More on that the day before the election.

8 Comments on "Ted Cruz Endorses Donald Trump: Go Vote While Unconscious (Drunk)"

  1. Oldphartbsa | 24/09/2016 at 02:57 |

    Write in “None of the Fucking Above!”

    That’s my plan. I’m sticking to it.

  2. Dan McKillop | 24/09/2016 at 07:38 |

    I think Vermin Supreme can’t be a bad choice.

    We’re having an election night party. Not watching the returns, just watching Idiocracy instead.

  3. Chuck ND | 24/09/2016 at 23:28 |

    Well, y’know, Ted DID actually give his word in a pledge, way back at the start of Official Silly Season. Remember?

    He just fulfilled his pledge, demonstrated he’s a man of his word and principles…

    • Yeah, that pledge to the GOP is so much more important than that pledge to defend and protect that damned piece of paper called The Constitution and the voters he promised so much to. Oh, and the promise to defend the honor of his wife and father also.

      • Afinikeet | 25/09/2016 at 13:12 |

        Man. That’s well said. Hey, regarding protocol here and following folks, I mean not to offend if I follow, what I like is being able to quickly find folks who are kindred spirits or respected voices. Tell me what you’d prefer, and I’ll comply.

        • Do your own thing, I’m an actual Constitutional Libertarian, not a wannabe.

          • Afinikeet | 25/09/2016 at 14:56 |

            I wish there was a Constitutional Libertarian party. I’d join it.
            As it is, there’s the Libertarian party whose nominee believes in man-caused global warming. Then again, had I been registered in the Libertarian party instead of Republican, I could have voted (presumably) in the Libertarian primary and helped selected the BETTER guy (I’ve forgotten his name).
            I really kinda think it’s all downhill from here.

    • Afinikeet | 25/09/2016 at 13:16 |

      Yes, the same pledge that months ago, Donald Trump broke not just to Cruz, but to every other nominee. Yet here is Cruz honoring that same pledge to the man who broke it, a television character nominated by the opposition.
      It is lunacy to advocate for Trump to win a mandate. When you say you’re voting for Trump, that is what you’re advocating.
      I’m advocating to everyone, Democrats and Republicans, liberals and democrats, none of the above, independents — vote third party so whichever one wins, goes I with a majority opposed — a plurality. If I win, and Hillary or Trump go in with a majority of Americans on record as opposed, my conscience can live very nicely with that.

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