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JohnGaltFLA’s Extremely Drunk 2023 Predictions

Way, way, way back in the day, there was a great conspiracy television show which preyed on the fears of a suspecting American public that the US government was part of a gigantic globalist conspiracy.

However the World Economic Forum says these fears are unfounded.

Since the one episode of the X-Files where flight 549 crashed however, I have always flown with this thought in mind:

The drunk guy always survives the crash.

That philosophy has always served me well while traveling except at the customs office in Tortola that one time which can not be mentioned.

With that mea culpa out of the way, here we go with the 2023 predictions, drink up because how could it be any worse than 2022?

Tonight, I’m going to do this somewhat different. It is ten minutes until ten o’clock Eastern time, and I thought let’s try this and see who pays attention. I will post a prediction, publish, then update it every 5 or 10 minutes; maybe longer if I need a bathroom break. Per the picture of one of more of my books (which should provide a clue), I’m drinking some really cheap Johnny Walker “Game of Thrones” scotch in my ‘shot’ glass so this should be a morbidly entertaining thread until I finish. Or pass out. With that, let us roll…

I. Geopolitics

-Russia’s winter offensive into Ukraine shocks the West with Kharkov, Izyum, the remainder of the Donbass, and Zaporozhye under complete Russian control by March 2023. The rail network is severely impaired and resupply to forward units east of the Dnieper River becomes difficult at best, impossible in some combat areas. Poland offers to provide an air and ground protective umbrella from Lvov west to the Polish border with their military further escalating the conflict with NATO.

-China’s delayed invasion of Taiwan begins.

-South Africa devolves into a state of civil war causing commodity prices to skyrocket.

-Egypt imposes capital controls due to a spiraling economic situation towards hyperinflation. Saudi Arabia and the GCC intervene with Russia agreeing to massive food aid packages.

-India and China sign a new Russian sponsored BRICS peace treaty and agree to further economic cooperation to avoid conflict.

-Indonesia, Malaysia, Algeria, Mexico, and Iran join the BRICS nations.

-The Chinese aircraft carrier Liaoning conducts a provocative demonstration sailing around the US Hawaiian Islands approaching on a similar course the one used by the Japanese in 1941.

-Greece and Turkey come to the brink of war with aircraft from both sides shot down during the summer of 2023.

-Iceland holds a referendum to withdraw from the NATO treaty.

II. Economic Predictions

-Gold finishes 2023 with a decent gain closing above $2050 per ounce. Silver is stronger finishing December 2023 at the $35 plus level.

-The S&P 500 closes at 3900. This is after dipping down to 2600 and rallying back to 4200 before deteriorating in the winter of 2023.

-Oil starts strong peaking somewhere near $125 in April of 2023 before slowly falling to settle near $90 per barrel by December.

-The Federal Reserve conducts a shocking 0.50% rate increase in March after 0.50% in February, after a shocking CPI reading of 8.5% annualized reading in February. The PCE core rate remains stubbornly above 6% and wage inflation hits the Feds original schedule to stabilize rate increases. Markets crater as a result.

-Bed Bath and Beyond, Big Lots, and several other regional retailers join the bankruptcy parade by March 2023.

-After the shocking CPI readings in the first half of 2023, President Biden proposes price controls (yes, like Nixon) to control energy and food prices.

-Bitcoin crashes to $7,000 before rallying over $15,000 in the autumn of 2023 finishing the year essentially flat.

-Rare earth exports, including lithium, are restricted from nations no longer wanting to use the US dollar in trade. The EV industry sales are flat for 2023.

-The US Dollar (common) index peaks between 120-125 by early in the 2nd quarter of 2023 then rolls over to finish the year below 90.

-Bank failure Fridays return to 27 banks fail by the end of 2023.

III. US Politics

-Governor Ron DeSantis announces he will run for President after the Hurricane Franklin crisis in Fort Lauderdale is resolved by September 12, 2023.

-Former President Donald Trump withdraws from the 2024 Presidential race in mid-December due to “health reasons” and family concerns.

-Nancy Pelosi finally retires after Easter 2023.

-Hillary Clinton officially announces she’s running for President Labor Day weekend of 2023 after Biden announces he will not run again.

-The Supreme Court has a shocking opening due a death of a conservative justice due to health reasons.

-Texas becomes the first state to offer officially offer dual citizenship as the “Republic of Texas” and the United States in defiance of the Biden regime. It’s purely symbolic, but 5 million Texans register for it.

-The Biden administration officially announces the ban of imports for all foreign manufactured hollow point ammunition, pistol and rifle magazines greater than five rounds, and any firearm declared an “assault rifle” per the ATF’s new 2023 definitions.

-California, Illinois, and New York all have their exit taxes declared unconstitutional by the Supreme Court. The court also orders refunds for all citizens illegal taxes collected since 2015.

IV. Natural Events

-The 2023 hurricane season is a slow one with only 12 named storms, 2 severe ones with one hitting Central America as a Cat 4 and one hitting Florida as a Cat 4.

-Two major earthquakes rattle Japan and two more (7.0 +) hit the United States.

-A major blizzard creates an inflationary and economic disaster the first week of March 2023.

V. Sports, Culture, Fluffernuttery

-The University of Georgia wins the NCAA Football National Championship beating TCU 47-24.

-The Tampa Bay Lightning win their third Stanley Cup in 4 years (homer, I know).

-The Tampa Bay Buccaneers make it to the Super Bowl but lose to the Cincinnati Bengals in overtime, 38-35.

-Three streaming services merge after deteriorating financial results due to poor programming choices.

-The most popular reality TV show on streaming becomes an all female sports shooting program with semi-auto and full automatic weapons.

-The women’s professional soccer league admits transgendered players as “females” into the sport. Popularity and viewership plummets.

-MSNBC lays off 50% of its staff as ratings plummet.

-CNN hires Sean Hannity at a record $15 million per year to save their prime time ratings (it doesn’t).

-China unleashes a new Covid variant which is impervious to the current vaccines killing mostly the elderly and causing panic in Western nations.

-The Netherlands becomes the first nation to ban the combustion engine effective 2040. No one cares.

I think that’s enough for this run. To all of my friends a good night and more about the economic and geopolitical predictions over the weekend with lots of fun charts, links, and reasons to buy more gold, silver, and ammo.

Now to get rid of more of that shitty scotch from Johnny Walker, bleh.

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  1. ontoiran ontoiran 12/31/2022

    how does sean hannity still have a job?

    • 01/01/2023

      It’s a question the universe even ponders every moment. He’s such a fraud.

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